What is NLP and how can it help you?
What is NLP? – There are many different ways of describing NLP, one I use is….
Neuro - how we use our mind
Linguistic - how we use language to influence our mind
Programming - how we use language to programme our minds.
Here are some definitions I have heard people use when trying to explain NLP:
- noticing what happens, noticing what works
- modelling success
- studying and replicating excellence (bench marking)
- being curious, asking: “How do you do that?', ‘what is the difference that makes the difference?'
- about adding strategies, rather than taking away
- increasing choices and options
- ‘the Alexander Technique for the mind'.
And all of the above are true. NLP is about understanding how small changes in how we represent things in our mind, through our thoughts, pictures and messages, have a powerful impact on how we feel, behave and ultimately how successful we are.
Are you aware of the thoughts and pictures you have in your head and the impact they have on your behaviour and performance? Is the impact positive or negative?
‘Behaviour is a mirror in which everyone shows his image.' Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Is NLP about eye movements? – This is a common question that I am asked as people have often heard about this and think that is what NLP is. However, NLP is about modelling success in a host of different arenas, therefore there are now a wide range of techniques and models that come under the banner of NLP. The techniques I use myself and introduce to clients are the ones that came out of my NLP Practitioner and Master Practitioner programmes that I attended over 10 years ago, plus others I have learned along the way. I have also adapted many techniques to make them easier to use.
Over the years I have referred to a number of NLP techniques in Inspire and there are also NLP techniques in my book, ‘Master Your Inner Critic, Release Your Inner Wisdom'. However, as with my training programmes, I do not necessarily label them as ‘NLP', they are just useful models and techniques to use.
‘Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from indomitable will.' Mahatma Ghandi
What do you believe? I thought I would share with you some of the presuppositions that NLP is based on. A presupposition is something that you believe or suppose to be true. As you read them just notice your reactions to them. Some will resonate or clarify what you already believe, others you might disagree with. What we believe will influence how we view the world, interact with others, and even ultimately how successful we are. Here are a few of the NLP presuppositions:
- People respond to their map of reality, not to reality itself.
- Rapport is meeting individuals at their map of the world.
- Communication is both verbal and non-verbal, both conscious and unconscious.
- You cannot not communicate. You are always communicating in all three major representational systems - visual, auditory, and kinaesthetic.
- The meaning of the communication is the response it elicits.
- There is no failure, only feedback. Every experience can be utilised.
- Every behaviour is useful in some context. Every behaviour has a positive intention.
- Your current behaviour is the best choice possible for you at this time.
- It is easier to change yourself than others. To change somebody else, first change yourself.
- People are doing the best they can, given the choices they believe are available to them.
Which ones resonate with you? How do they help you in your work and your life? Which ones do you question or find hard to believe? What would it be like to live as if you believe them? ‘If you want to be happy, practise it every day.' Robert Anton Wilson
The uses and misuses of NLP – On day one of my NLP Practitioner training programme (it took five, four day modules), the trainer answered people's concerns about the misuse of NLP. He used the example of a knife, which can be used for many positive purposes: to eat, to carve beautiful things but, in the wrong hands, it can be used to very negative ends. And certainly NLP, like anything, can be used in both positive and negative ways. I have certainly met people who have had very bad experiences of NLP being ‘done to them'. For me the big difference in terms of the good use or misuse of NLP, is if someone who is trained and uses NLP with others, practises what they preach, and uses the ideas and techniques themselves. This then leads to an authenticity in what they do. Also my approach is to provide techniques that clients can use themselves, rather than doing NLP to others. My aim is to work with you to enable you to learn to use the techniques yourself.
Do you want to learn more about NLP? – The books listed on the right hand column are a good introduction to NLP and their applications. Also see the right hand column for information about the types of NLP courses available.
Do you want an NLP Taster Session? From time to time I run NLP Taster Sessions within organisations, for business or professional networks. If you are interested in organising such an event for your organisation or network then click here to email me and we can discuss this further.
Do you want an NLP workshop focussed on a particular topic? In my training courses NLP can be applied to a range of topics from assertiveness, people management and stress management to goal setting and creating success at work. If you are interested in finding out more click here to email me and we can discuss this further.
‘Most people see what is, and never see what can be.' Albert Einstein
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For more information about how we can assist you or to discuss anything in confidence please call Melanie on 01865 377334 or click here to email me. For more information about Grovelands visit our website by clicking here.
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