Dear Reader

Are you doing what you really want with your life?This month's Inspire is based on recent experiences I've had which will become clear in the main body of the newsletter. These experiences got me thinking about how we can ensure that we are living the life we want to live.

See the right hand column for more information on:

May & June Public Workshops – last workshops before the Autumn:

  • Master Your Inner Critic, Release Your Inner Wisdom – 17th May
  • Managing Challenging Interactions – 5th June
  • Coaching & Performance Management 17th June.

Postponed New Zealand book launch

Do you want to order copies of my book Master Your Inner Critic, Release Your Inner Wisdom?  Simply email me and I can send you an order form. 

Best wishes

Melanie Greene

Are you doing what you really want with your life?

The background to this edition of Inspire – Many of you will know that in March I was heading off to New Zealand for an extended holiday, as well as launching my book there. Some of you who have worked with me recently will also know that my father has been ill. Twelve hours after arriving in NZ I heard that my father had died and I headed back to the UK the following day.

There have been many thoughts that have occurred to me since then that might find their way into Inspire in the months to come. What I wanted to focus on here is about asking whether you are living the life you want to live and what legacy do you want to leave behind you?

What impact do we have on others? – My father was a well known figure in the hospitality industry having been one of the first hotel consultants in the UK. He wrote many books on marketing hotels; had been a visiting professor at two universities and received an OBE for his services to the hospitality industry. But it turns out that was not what he is really remembered for. In all the letters and emails that my family received about him from family, friends, neighbours and business associates, it was his ability to connect with people that made an impact on others. Many people in his industry wrote to say that he had been a mentor and inspiration to them and that their careers were down to the influence that he had on them early on. My parents have lived in the same house for 43 years and three sons of a neighbour wrote in a card about the positive impact he had had when they were growing up in the street.

When his rabbi asked us what the driving force was for my dad, my mum, brother and I simultaneously said ‘people'. He could not go into a restaurant or hospital without finding out about the waiter, the nurse and where they were from and how they came to be doing what they were doing.

This is what he will be remembered for and it got me thinking about all of our lives. Do we get so caught up in the doing, the tasks of life that we forget about the human to human interactions and how important they are? Think about yourself: are you taking the time to really connect with your colleagues, clients, family and friends – or even the next time you go into a shop? Do we get distracted by the task in hand and forget the people around us.

Are you doing what you want to do with your life?Before I set off for NZ I visited my dad in hospital and he was talking about his life, and reminiscing about his travels through his work, the different projects he was involved in and the fun times we have had as a family – he concluded with ‘It's been a great life!'. That was despite having his first heart attack at 47 and many years of illness and challenges, including cancer. But he continued to enjoy life, travel for pleasure and enjoy many happy times with his family, despite the challenges he was facing.

None of us know when our life might be up – so it is worth reflecting now on the following questions:

  • Is your life the life you dreamed it would be? If not what can you do about it? What is missing?
  • What is stopping you from enjoying your day to day life?
  • What is causing you grief? What do you need to change, or drop from your life to make it one that you fully enjoy?
  • If you are facing huge challenges that can't be avoided (and there are many times when this happens in life) what can you do to make sure that you can thrive in this environment and not just survive?
  • How can you enhance the relationships you have with others?

Don't let the inner critic undermine your satisfactionI was so pleased that my dad made it to the UK launch of my book and read it. Unfortunately with not enough time to put it into practice in the weeks before he died he asked both my brother and I separately whether he had been a good dad. We were very fortunate as he was a great dad, supportive, fun and a mentor to both of us in our businesses. But it was that old inner critic that led him to doubt whether he had been ‘good enough'. We of course reassured him, and I hope that he was able to take it on board. But what about you?

Is your inner critic stopping you from seeing what you have achieved in your life, from seeing that you are ‘good enough' and that you ‘do enough'?

Remember to look at the ‘glass half full' rather than ‘half empty' – focus on what you have done, not what you have still want to achieve.

This is a quote that I read out at my dad's funeral…

‘To die well, one must have lived well. For those who have lived true to their convictions, who have worked to bring happiness to others, death can come as a comforting rest, like the well-earned sleep that follows a day of enjoyable exertions.' Daisaku Ikeda from A Piece of Mirror

For more information about Grovelands visit our website: or call 01865 377334 or email to arrange a time to speak in confidence.

Do you want to further develop your ability to…

  • communicate with others more effectively especially in difficult situations
  • manage your mood and motivate yourself
  • maintain your confidence levels especially when dealing with new challenges
  • manage the performance of your staff on a day to day basis
  • provide coaching support to team members.

Our public workshops are attended by:

  • managers and leaders in organisations
  • self employed people
  • people within the public sector
  • people looking to develop themselves in a professional and personal capacity.

You will gain:

  • Practical ideas, techniques that are proven to work
  • On-going email support following the workshop to assist you in putting your ideas into practice
  • Trainers who ‘practice what they preach' and can share practical ideas as to how to use the models and techniques that you will learn
  • Training booklets with plenty of exercises you can use following the workshops

To find out more or to book a place on the following workshops email






Master Your Inner Critic, Release Your Inner Wisdom - Saturday 17th May.**

Managing Challenging Interactions workshop - Thursday 5th June. **

**£100 plus VAT for one day workshop and two e coaching emails. £160 plus VAT for above plus one hour telephone coaching session.

Coaching & Performance Management on Tuesday 17th June. Run in conjunction with Oxford Brookes University £225 plus VAT with discounts for associate staff and OBCAMS members, to include lunch and refreshments. Click here for details.




Postponed New Zealand book launch – I plan to return to New Zealand in March 2009 to launch the book and maybe even run a public workshop based on the book. If you are in NZ then watch this space or email me on to be kept informed of future events in NZ.


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