Is It Possible To Motivate Others

• Who has control over motivation? – if people are really de-motivated or down, can we motivate them or do we only have power over our own motivation. I have certainly seen how managers (parents, partners, and friends) can definitely de-motivate others – a careless comment, the lack of thanks and acknowledgement of a job well done, does more to de-motivate than you would appreciate.

• How good is your relationship with them? – the strength of your connection with the other person will affect how they will respond to any actions you take. Ask yourself how much rapport do you have with them, do you relate well to each other. Without having some kind of connection it is more of a challenge to support and motivate others. Therefore, if you don’t have much rapport, start by improving your relationship with them and this in itself might help to raise their spirits and motivate them.

‘Real conversations required to sustain a relationship are easily recognised. They are the ones that keep getting put off for another day.’ Stephen Lundin, John Christensen & Harry Paul – FISH for Life

• What lifts their spirits? – If you have a good connection with them then you are likely to know what motivates and lifts their spirits, and this might help you to know what action to take. For example, do they need someone to listen to them, some more fun in their lives or more stimulation at work, or do they need some practical support?

‘Only as we connect with our conscience can we create the fire within.’ Stephen Covey

• What de-motivates others? – again this will vary from person to person. It can be lack of acknowledgement for time and effort made; being spoken down to or patronised; not being listened to or having their ideas acknowledged.

Is there anything in your behaviour that might be de-motivating those around you?

‘An angry look on the face is wholly against nature. If it be assumed frequently, beauty begins to perish, and in the end is quenched beyond rekindling.’ Marcus Aurelius

• What motivates them? – People are motivated in different ways, one way of looking at this is to find out if they are an ‘Away from’ or ‘Towards’ person:
  • ‘Away from’ people are motivated to take action to avoid things going wrong, to avoid current or future pain and difficulties. For example:
    • Tom decided not to delegate some work, as he would have to spend time explaining what needs to be done, it might not be done right and it might be more time consuming in the end.
    • Jane moved to an new job because she did not get on with her colleagues.
  • ‘Towards’ people are motivate to take action to move towards what they want, rather than moving away from what they do not want. For example:
    • Sally delegates work as she can see that in the long run it will create more time for her and will develop the skills of her team.
    • John moves to a new job as it provides more managerial opportunities and an outlet for his creative skills

Are you an ‘Away From’ or ‘Towards’ person?  Think about people you are looking to motivate – do you need to give them positive things to move towards or emphasise what problems they will eradicate or avoid if they take certain action.

Want more Inspiration? If you want any support in dealing with your own or other people’s motivational issues, we can offer 1:1 support or group workshops to assist you in doing this. Just call 01865 377334 or email mg@grovelands.org.uk  to arrange a time to speak in confidence. For more information about Grovelands visit our website: www.grovelands.org.uk

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